"Throughout the whole absurd life I'd lived, a dark wind has been rising toward me from somewhere deep in my future, across years that were still to come, and as it passed, this wind leveled whatever was offered to me at the time, in years no more real than the ones I was living."
Is Meursault finally realizing that his future is no longer going to exsist because he lives his life now so negatively? Has it occured to him that his life has had no meaningful purpose?
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I believe that Meursalt is finally realizing that his future is coming to an end. He understands the consequences for shooting the Arab, however he reveals in his text that he belives he would want to relive his life over again. His entire philosophy on life is that life has no meaningful purpose, so I believe Meursalt knew the entire time he was going to die and his life was meaningless.
I would say the Meursault does believe that his essence is futile. However, I do not think that this is the first time he comes upon this thought in his own mind. Throughout the entire novel Meursault shows signs and uses phrases that convey to the reader his idea of life being meaningless. For example when he offered a better job in Paris he replies by saying, “People never change there lives, that in any case one life was as good as another and that I wasn’t dissatisfied with mine here at all” (Camus 41). He tells his boss that he does not desire to achieve any thing greater in his life giving his boss the sense that he has no ambition. And when he finally reveals that he does not believe in God, every statement he makes and everything he does begins to make sense. Not believing in God, he reveals he is living without a purpose and with out any reinforcement to accomplish goals.
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